What It Takes to Truly Become More

halleywhite
Oct 13, 2022
3 min read

As humans we are programmed to depend on and trust that what we are taught is what is right. Whether it be respecting others or working toward unrealistic expectations, we are consistently required to question what we know in order to truly become more. I have been through several different relationships including between cousins, extended family, parents, siblings, and friendships that have taught me that it is okay to challenge what we are taught. Growth comes in uncomfortable positions and that is the first step to becoming more.

Becoming more is not an easy task in any way but by following these steps it can be made easier.

1. Question What You Know

Each of us have been taught different rules and guidelines that make up who we are. We have been taught different things like being kind, reliable, and trustworthy. Things like trusting those around us and forgiving those for their wrongdoings. While all of these things can be good, it is important to question those guidelines in order to become more. Asking questions in life, learning, and growth can be more important than the answers we receive because it opens us up to completely new information and opportunity.

2. Break

Growing may feel like breaking at first and that is completely normal. In order to become more we need to break out of our habits, our comfort zones, and our own heads to face our fears. Becoming uncomfortable is the key to growth and the easiest way to start is to break out of what we are use to.

"and what do the flower buds pushing up from the broken earth say about you?

we break to grow." -pavana

3. Apologize... or Don't

When in the wrong it is important to own and apologize for said mistakes. It is so important to realize that not all we do is deserving of an apology. Things you don't need to apologize for include

existing
saying "no"
how you feel
setting boundaries
not responding to things that are not worth your energy
prioritizing self care
disappointing people for putting yourself first
outgrowing people, places, or things
outgrowing yourself

4. Become a Priority

Make time for you. Many people think of self care and making oneself a priority is not indulgent or selfish, it is necessary. Make YOU your first priority and become your own best friend. It is important to trust that you are enough for yourself and by making yourself a priority you can learn to love who you are ultimately helping us to be proud of who we are. Very easily we get lost in the idea that we are not enough whether it be comparison through social media or true world distractions, taking care of the bodies we have been given physically and mentally can help us each to become more.

5. Set Boundaries

Boundaries are the personal limits and rules that we set for ourselves in relationships whether they be romantic, familial, or friendships. Setting boundaries allows for growth in building stronger relationships. Without proper boundaries people often cross the unwritten lines ultimately creating tension or heightened emotion among individuals and relationships. When setting boundaries it is important to consider the beliefs, values, traditions, and customs we hold in order to limit our choices and the impact of others crossing our lines. Physically we set boundaries to keep ourselves and those around us safe, but it is so important to also set those emotional and mental boundaries to continue the growth of ourselves.